First thing: No matter how much time you spend polishing your profile, honing your IM banter, and perfecting your message introductions, it’s your picture that matters most to a lot of people. It's something that deserves mentioning upfront. If you're a 3 and the girl is an 8, then don't bother messaging her (or at least, don't expect much) and move on to the next girl. You know how it is. You discard overweight girls simply because attraction is an important factor for mating. They do the same thing to you.
Save profiles to your PC. Keep the profiles of interesting mates along with images and maybe even personality traits to your desktop so that you don't have to keep visiting the other person to remember who they are, what they look like, etc. And so it doesn't look like you're visiting her profile everyday. (I haven't not done that never before.)
Save girls to your profile and leave notes. It's the save button on the girl's profile. Tip: Hide girls you don't like.
Search other guys in the area. How's the competition? Read their profiles. Does it sound better than yours? Think how you can incorporate some of their info to yours. Hint: browse other cities/states.
Set up a sock as an older you and living elsewhere. You'll use this sock to check out the playing field. Important: set to not visible and answer the questions as your real profile exactly the same. Use this when you don't want the other person to see you're viewing their profile. Not necessary for most people, only for creepers. (*shifts eyes*)
Pictures are most important. If you're attractive, put up many pictures. Classy pictures (outfit for a friend's wedding) work the best in attracting the best guys and not just lustful barbarians.
If you're overweight or unattractive... nothing you can do but choose your best picture. Check your pictures on Facebook. Which ones are the most complimented and commented? Those will be interesting to OKC girls, too. You shouldn't omit a full-body picture and don't do myspace poses. However, there are good acceptable poses for big and tall people. Read some tips on the web from photographers. (Hint: angle poses are better, not looking straight ahead).
Pictures
Have at least 5 pictures, but no more than 7.
- Headshot picture. From your next and higher. Preferably smiling.
- Group picture. With friends at a bar or relatives at a family event. No ex-girlfriends or ex-boyfriends.
- Body picture. Can be at any event or social setting. Bonus, if you've got a good body and you're at the beach. That's the only time girls will accept an abs pic.
- Recent picture. Something from the last 6 months. More recent if you've changed your appearance.
- Interest picture. A pic of something you enjoy doing. Running, traveling, concert, playing guitar, eating sushi.
- Interest picture 2. Why another interest picture? Because they commonly lead to conversation starters.
- Picture where you especially shine. May already be inclusive in one of the above pictures.
- Don't post pics with ex-girlfriend.
- Don't post pics with girls who are flirting with you at some bar. It makes you seem like a player.
- Don't post drunk pics.
- Don't take pics at the mirror in your bathroom.
- Don't post kid or baby pictures.
- Don't post two very similar pictures (one looking at camera, one looking away).
- Do smile.
- Do show your interests, even if that involves Legos. (Hey, Legos are cool).
- Do write descriptive or witty captions on all your pictures.
Look at your profile. Does it sound and look interesting to you? Is it a wall of text that even you don't want to read?
Write your profile as soon as your register. Don't sign up and then wait 2 weeks before filling it out. Do it right away because users receive email notification of new members and you want them looking at a fresh, complete profile.
Show as much of your personality as possible. Be enthusiastic about your hobbies. There are too many dull profiles out there. I like this. I like that. I'm like this but also like this opposite thing. Be specific. Be unique.
Make frequent updates to your profile. When you update text or add photos, you show up on people activity wall.
Don't list off 50 bands. List 5-10 of your favorite, you're favorite live show and maybe link to your last.fm profile.
List dealbreakers. But don't be too limiting on the "nice to haves". It's already difficult to meet girls on OKC that you don't want to turn away potential mates.
Think about conversation starters. Read your profile. What are some things a stranger would find interesting and potentially message? (doesn't matter, girls don't message guys on OKCupid. kidding! ;)
Read the guide on OKC forums.
Complete 50-100 questions.
Keep certain questions private. It's probably not a good idea to let you partner know you have rape fantasies. Better yet, don't answer them unless they're important to you and it's something you find important in your partner.
Pick matches that are 60% and up. People have had considerable success with this lower-bound percentage, rather than limiting themself to something like 80% and up. Match % doesn't mean everything in all cases. Read profiles, view pictures, send message. Don't be afraid to go for some of the curvy girls if you're not having luck with ones you are messaging. They're cool, too.
Learn how to spell. You probably already know, but you may have made a typo. Copy into Microsoft Word and run spellcheck.
Messages
Mention something in their profile. What's interesting? What interests do you share? Start a conversation from there.
Don't mention their beauty. They've heard it hundreds of times before by the sex-craved mongrels on OKC.
Message length. I have no idea, but OKC does. See this post and this post.
External links and resources
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